In the oh-so-famous words of Eddard Stark, “Winter is coming.” You’d best be prepared, and not just for the wind and cold. Get ready for a dearth of predictions surrounding the upcoming fourth season of “Game of Thrones.” Many of these will revolve around the show’s vast collection of characters, both living and dead. Four seasons in, these speculations remain entertaining, for the HBO series is one of few to take somewhat interesting characters from off the page and bring them to life on the small screen.
Each holds a completely different motive… and each reflects a distinct personality type. Answer the following questions to find out which character best resembles your demeanor:
1. What is your most notable physical characteristic?
A. Your short stature.
B. Your pale blond locks.
C. Your sizable ‘member.’
D. None, or rather, your ability to blend in as the situation requires.
2. Which possession do you prize above all others?
A. Your money. You believe you’re “quite good” at spending it.
B. Your three dragons.
C. Again, your sizable ‘member.’
D. A sword that, although small, has killed before and will kill again.
3. You have the hots for…
A. A prostitute with a heart of gold.
B. Your very masculine, but very caring husband from an arranged marriage.
C. Your sister.
D. An apprentice blacksmith who serves as your friend and protector.
4. In your opinion, what is the ultimate worst insult?
A. An attack on your intelligence or ability to pay off debts.
B. The theft of your beloved dragons.
C. Telling you that you reek and then naming you “Reek.” Either that, or cutting off your sizable ‘member.’
D. Any comparison to your sister.
Mostly A’s: Tyrion Lannister
What you lack in physical size, you make up for in sheer wit. Your siblings and subjects may attempt to take advantage of your short stature, but you answer with brutal intelligence. Oh, and of course, as a Lannister, you always pay your debts.
Image by RanZag via Wikimedia Commons
Mostly B’s: Daenerys Targaryen
Khaleesi, Mother of Dragons… you go by many names, but friends and foes alike best know you as the possessor of unmatched courage. Your fiery nature and quick tongue may get you in trouble from time to time, but your passionate nature always gets you out of self-imposed scrapes. There’s a reason BuzzFeed refers to you as the biggest badass on “Game of Thrones.”
Image by Sabrina Krilic via Flickr
Mostly C’s: Theon Greyjoy
Believing yourself to be an outsider in all circumstances, you take your discomfort out on those who have provided you with warm meals and a roof over your head… but not much in the way of love. You possess an obnoxious sneer, and for some time, an obnoxious sexual organ. But that’s no longer a problem, as your body parts are being slowly carved away by your number one adversary.
Image by Eva Rinaldi via Flickr
Mostly D’s: Arya Stark
The orphaned daughter of Eddard and Catelyn Stark, you differ in every respect from your sister Sansa. Feisty in some situations and timid in others, you are the ultimate survivor, even when survival demands you take part in plots you’d otherwise find despicable.
Image by Jemimus via Flickr
Although season 4 began filming this summer, the cast and crew are tight-lipped about what fans can look forward to. Actress Lena Headey told Access Hollywood that the stakes are high and the show just gets better and better. Be sure you’ve subscribed to HBO before the premiere next spring. Bundling TV and Internet helps with the added cost of the cable network, and HBO offers HBO GO allowing you to watch instant and unlimited access to all “Game of Thrones,” past and present. Start your marathon now in preparation. It’ll change your TV viewing life forever.
Editor’s Note: The above article was guest-written by Luke Davidson.